Discover Where I Longed to Be, a monumental oil painting that reflects on longing, belonging and the search for places where nature and everyday life exist in harmony.

Where I Longed to Be (Diptych)

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Discover Where I Longed to Be, a monumental oil painting that reflects on longing, belonging and the search for places where nature and everyday life exist in harmony.
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  • Discover Where I Longed to Be, a monumental oil painting that reflects on longing, belonging and the search for places where nature and everyday life exist in harmony.
  • The left panel of the large scale painting Where I Longed to Be
  • The right panel of the painting Where Longed to Be
  • Discover Where I Longed to Be, a monumental oil painting that reflects on longing, belonging and the search for places where nature and everyday life exist in harmony.
  • The left panel of the large scale painting Where I Longed to Be
  • The right panel of the painting Where Longed to Be
Where I Longed to Be (Diptych)

Where I Longed to Be (Diptych)

Created in early 2021, Where I Longed to Be began with a simple question: If I could go anywhere, where would I most want to be? The answer was not a distant city or an extraordinary destination, but an open landscape where wild peonies bloom beneath an endless blue sky. As the painting evolved, so too did the imagined world around it. A cottage emerged beside the field, its windows thrown open to welcome the breeze, while a vase of freshly gathered peonies brought the landscape indoors. Inspired by a longing for freedom, tranquillity and the restorative power of nature, the painting invites us to pause at the threshold between the life we inhabit and the places we continue to seek.
Story Behind the Painting

Where I Longed to Be was created over several months, beginning on New Year's Day in 2021. At the time, daily life had become unexpectedly confined, and the simple freedom of being outdoors felt more precious than ever. As I looked ahead to a new year, one question stayed with me:

If I could go anywhere, where would I most want to be?

The answer came immediately. I wanted to stand in a vast field of peonies.

For years, I had admired photographs of wild peony landscapes, imagining what it would feel like to walk among them as they bloomed. Although peonies flower for only a brief period each spring, it was never just the blossoms that drew me. It was the openness of the landscape, the endless horizon and the feeling of being completely immersed in nature.

The painting began simply as a peony field. As I worked, the vision continued to unfold. I began to imagine living beside this landscape rather than merely visiting it. A cottage gradually appeared, its windows opened wide to the fresh air. Finally, a vase of peonies found its place inside the room, gently dissolving the boundary between home and the landscape beyond.

The painting became more than a destination. It became a way of imagining a life lived in closer harmony with nature, where beauty is not reserved for special occasions but forms part of everyday experience. Although inspired by a longing for a particular place, the work ultimately reflects a universal hope that somewhere there are landscapes where we can breathe more deeply, slow down and feel at peace.
Artistic Enquiry

Where I Longed to Be explores the human longing for landscapes that restore a sense of freedom, wonder and belonging.

It asks why certain places occupy our imagination long before we have ever experienced them. Are we drawn to them simply because they are beautiful, or because they represent a way of living that feels more connected to the natural world?

Rather than presenting an imaginary paradise, the painting reflects on the landscapes we continue to search for throughout our lives. They are places where the boundaries between home and nature dissolve, where beauty becomes part of everyday living, and where we are reminded that our relationship with the natural world is as much emotional as it is physical.
Looking Deeper

The painting explores the quiet relationship between longing and place.

It begins with a simple desire to stand within a landscape where nature unfolds freely, uninterrupted by the demands of everyday life. The open windows become an invitation rather than a boundary, encouraging the eye to wander from the intimacy of the room into the vastness of the landscape beyond. As the curtains move gently in the breeze and a vase of freshly gathered peonies sits inside, the distinction between home and nature begins to disappear.

The peony field itself represents far more than a spectacular display of flowers. A single peony can be admired for its beauty, but an entire landscape of wild peonies evokes abundance, freedom and nature without boundaries. It is a place where the eye can wander endlessly and where the rhythms of the natural world replace the routines of everyday life.

Although peonies bloom for only a short time each year, the landscape retains its beauty beyond their flowering. The painting therefore becomes less about a particular season than about the enduring search for places where we feel a sense of peace, belonging and possibility. Whether such places are discovered through travel or simply recognised when we encounter them, they remind us that beauty often lies not only in what we see, but in where we feel most alive.
Process & Materials

Painted in oil on two large canvas panels, Where I Longed to Be developed gradually over several months. Rather than following a fixed composition from the outset, the painting evolved through a series of intuitive decisions. The peony field came first, followed by the cottage, the open windows and finally the vase of flowers inside, each addition bringing the imagined landscape closer to everyday life.

Working on a scale of two metres wide allowed the landscape to unfold naturally, creating an immersive sense of space. As layers of oil paint slowly dried, the painting was taken outdoors into the garden. Resting against a rose arch, the afternoon sunlight cast delicate shadows of rambling rose leaves across the canvas. Their forms were so fleeting that they were traced directly onto the surface before the light shifted. Those shadows remain within the finished painting, preserving a brief collaboration between the changing garden and the painted landscape.

The slow drying time of oil paint became part of the creative process, allowing the composition to emerge through observation, imagination and reflection rather than being fully predetermined. The finished work retains that sense of gradual discovery, as though the landscape revealed itself one thought at a time.
Artwork Details

Year: 2021

Medium: Oil on canvas

Dimension: 200 cm (W) x 150 cm (H) x 4 cm (D) (diptych)

Artwork Status: Available by enquiry

There are places we remember, places we discover and places we continue searching for throughout our lives. Sometimes the landscapes we long for most reveal not only where we wish to be, but also the kind of life we hope to live.

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